Coming out

Now, if you happen to be the person who asked me on Formspring "Someone told me you are into girls. Are you? (This sounds like spam. It's really not)" then this blog isn't me finally 'fessing up. To the best of my knowledge I am heterosexual. I could be wrong, I may just have not yet met the woman for me, but realistically, I am friends with some of the most beautiful women on the planet. If they haven't managed to make fall for them, it's not likely. So if that's that's why you're here you're about to be very disappointed. This blog isn't about coming out of the closet in that way. This blog is about passion.

I am a very passionate person. When I love, I love completely. It's all-encompassing and consuming. If I give my devotion to something then it holds it almost indefinitely. Obviously, if I am betrayed then it changes but on the whole once I give something my loyalty then it's a keeper.

Everyone has passions. Some people are passionate about shoes, or sports. Some people are passionate about television series. Some are passionate about nature. But we all have something we are the most passionate about.

Check this out: 

This is the Nerd/Geek/Dork Venn diagram and can be viewed in all its glory here at Great White Snark which is where I first saw it.

The point I'm trying to make is that when we are passionate about something, we become obsessed with it. And obsession is one of the key factors in Nerd/Geek/Dorkism.

And when we have these traits, it's very hard to keep them under wraps. Our enthusiasm and zest for our chosen obsessions make them uncontainable. Our allegiance to them becomes public knowledge. We are proud of what we love and will fight for it.

But try explaining that to someone who just doesn't get it.

And that is what I mean by 'Coming out'.

It's not any kind of secret, and nor has it ever been, that I love Harry Potter. Because of HP I have done a lot of crazy things. I've met and subsequently gone to stay with people I'd only ever met on the Internet. I've attended a conference not knowing another soul there. I've flown to Scotland, Ireland and America. Across America, in fact. I've slept in Leicester Square in mid-November. This is the real deal. It's full-on Nerdtopia.

But how the hell do I explain why I, a fully-grown woman with a degree in Music Technology and a penchant for 1950's styling, am so into it?

'Why do I have to?' You ask. Well, in my line of work I work intensively with people. I spend an entire half of the year with them, living side-by-side with them. So things come out. Nothing can stay hidden. And as I said earlier, when you have a passion you want to shout it from the rooftops. To not do so, to deny or damp it down would be like a betrayal of your very soul. And also it's just polite to explain why you need two weeks holiday in mid-July and the exact time is non-negotiable. Or why you have to go to take photo's in a cinema in Norwich but not actually go and see a film. Or why you grin involuntarily when you hear certain words. When something is a big part of your life you can't hide it.

So inevitably, the time comes when I have to explain that I freaking love Harry Potter.

Reactions vary; some people don't care and just accept it; some think it's weird but OK; some think it's a sign of arrested development and that I should see a counsellor. Others ask questions and are intrigued. It's always different. I've tried a lot of ways of getting it out there too. From just saying 'I bloody well love HP' to 'Yeah, I might go - it'll be a laugh. Some of my mates like it...'

The trick is to remember that everyone has a passion. They might not think they are a nerd but they'll be nerdy about something. All you have to do is find out what it is and make sure you indulge it. And then use that to explain why it is you love what you love. Being a nerd isn't about glasses, or pocket protectors, or bad clothes, hair, shoes or any of the stuff the media tells us it's about. Being a nerd is about having passion.


So once again, I've come out. Discreetly and in a low key manner but never-the-less, I've done it. My parents know, the people I went to school with (and now only communicate with via Facebook) know, the staff in the Elephant House definitely know. And now my boss knows. My account with Nerdtopia is settled. I've been true to myself and truthful overall. I'm out.

Passion. Passion is important. Passion is the reason we get out of bed in the morning, the reason we put up with bad things, the reason we get excited about the future. And to fully embrace that passion you have to come out.