It's been AGES - AGAIN - since I've done a blog, so please insert the usual apologies about being a slack git in here <sorrysorrybegforgivenesspleaforabsolutionetc> In my defence, I've been very busy though. I've been to Baker Street (twice -more on that later) and to Ireland and I've been working on the jewellery making and expanding my repertoire and client base (that's wanky talk for made some new stuffs and doing a craft fair).
But the most exciting thing I've done has been go to Prague. On my own. For four whole days and five whole nights.
I was at work a couple of weeks ago and I realised I was about to have a fortnight off. With very little planned, other than staying in bed watching Sherlock. And that I was sorely in need of an adventure. So, I had a gander at lastminute.com and found I could fly to Prague for 5 nights for less than £200. I booked it exactly a week before my flight was due to take off.
Got some new dresses, got some Czech crowns, Googled the Metro map and the location of the closest zoo and I was off. Flying with the hilariously named Wizz Air.
On the plane, I realised I might have just made a pretty big mistake. Because I could have gone to visit friends in Ireland, Germany, Norway or Sweden. Instead, I'd booked a stay in a place I'd never been, where I knew no-one and where I didn't speak the language. Alone. Add this to the numerous warnings I got about the local police and pick-pockets and I was beginning to wish I'd packed more books and less clothes. Because if worse came to worst, I could always sit in the hotel drinking wine and reading.
Thank God I didn't pack more books.
I got to the airport and met my driver, who agreed to let me take his photo with the sign saying he was there for me. (My whole life, it's been on my Bucket List to have someone meet me at an airport with a sign with my name on it. I nearly had one in San Francisco, but due to an early landing plane and my desperation to get out of the airport, my friends didn't have time to unfurl the amazing banner they'd made to welcome me. Though I still have it. Anyway...). He was sweet enough to let me take his photo holding it. And then we got in the car and he said 'Let's go home'. And I was in love.
There was a mint on my pillow in the hotel, which is a sign of quality in my book. I'm not joking, I love a pillow mint. I had my wine from Duty Free, my pillow mint and The Bodyguard dubbed in Czech on the telly. It was perfect.
Day one saw me tentatively wandering around Hradcany for a bit, looking at pretty, pretty palaces and the literally awesome St Vitus' Cathedral. I can't read maps to save my life, so I tend to just stride around, trying to look like I know where I'm going. This is a good tactic for anywhere, by the way. Just stride forward purposefully. It works. And it enabled me to build up a smashing mind-map of the Castle District. I then headed down the Karlov Most (Charles Bridge to you lot) planning to go and have a look around town... And I accidentally wandered into the Museum of Medieval Torture Instruments.
Which put paid to my lunch ideas.
I also visited the Waxwork Museum (sucked in by Harry Potter in the window), found Baker Street, Praha and had a good old wander. Best of all, they sell hot wine on the streets for around 40czk. So I got to have mulled wine while I gallivanted about. As the sun went down I headed back to Hradcany, before trekking out to the Monastery to have dinner in a cave (Peklo). Not just any cave, but a cave Brangelina rather like. And Timothy Dalton. Get me. It was delicious and I had the Svíčková na smetaně – filet mignon s poctivou smetanovo-zeleninovou omáčkou, karlovarským knedlíkem a divokými brusinkami. Followed by the Domácí doboš s pistáciovou zmrzlinou a karamelem. Yum. And I tried some of Grandma's Herbal Liquor. Which was nice too.
Day two saw me scrap my plans to head out to Kutna Hora, in favour of further explorations of central Prague and a foray into New Town. I went to have a mooch around the Jewish Quarter and then headed over to Wenceslas Square. I bought Chamber of Secrets in Czech (as tradition now dictates, I must return from a trip to a new place with a native copy of Harry Potter). I found a tucked away vintage paradise and proceeded to spend a happy hour trying on all manner of frocks and jackets. As I went to pay for my bounty, the lady spoke to me in Czech. When I apologised, she tried again in English, asking me if I would still be in Prague on the 1st of March. I thought she meant that must be the latest I could return the jacket I was buying, so I said no and that I wouldn't need to bring it back. She laughed and said "No, no... I want you to catwalk for me. We are doing a show and you would be good in it."
CUE MASSIVE SMUGFACED GRIN LASTING THE REST OF THE DAY.
I need to move to Europe. Seriously. I'm so under-appreciated in this country.
Dinner that night was in a pretty little restaurant around the corner. And afterwards... Feeling very brave... I went for a stroll.
Prague at night is beautiful. Despite the unfamiliar terrain, the winding corners and alleys, I felt completely safe. It's so well lit and peaceful that I was comfortable just exploring quietly. I found a late-night shop, bought a bottle of wine and was about to head back to the hotel when I turned a corner and found myself in front of the Loretta, which is where all the Weeping Angels in Prague hang out. I should point out at this point in time, I'm also wearing a deerstalker.
So there I am, bottle of wine in one hand, camera in the other, deerstalker on my bonce, exploring the grounds of this beautiful church, when I realise there is a car behind me. It was the fuzz! Shit - I thought - they're going to come and ask for my passport and take it from me and charge me a million crowns to get it back. And they might take my wine. And my hat...
They drove on.
Which was kind of the theme for all of my encounters with the law. Unless you were doing a crime, they didn't care. There are a lot of police about, they patrol everywhere but they're not the demons the Internet led me to believe they were. So, sorry to the police of Prague. Thanks for not being corrupt. You're doing a cracking job.
Day three saw me venture out to Kutna Hora to go to Sedluc Ossuary, which is this amazing church that houses the bones of around 40,000 people. On display. As art. This was an exciting day for me as it meant I'd get my first go at using the Prague Metro (which is like the Tube) and also the overground rail system...
EASY.
Seriously, it's so straightforward and well sign-posted that I felt almost cheated. I have moments on the Underground here where I get confused but they just don't let that happen. They signpost. There are helpful staff waiting to answer your questions. There are interactive information boards that tell you all about your trains. So I got on my train, sat in a Potter-esque compartment and read until we arrived in Kutna Hora.
Inside the Ossuary it was much colder than it was outside. Whether this is because of the way it's built, or the psychosomatic effect of being inside a mass-grave, I don't know. It was eerily beautiful, strange, creepy and also serene. The bones are arranged so artfully, that after the initial feeling of being inside one of Giger's masturbatory fantasies, it was easy to appreciate the craftsmanship that had gone into arranging these remains into something spectacular. There's a funny thing about seeing so many bones arranged so prettily, you forget what it is you're looking at. You stop noticing ribs and start appreciating the way they curve into and over each other. It's a small church, but unforgettable from the moment you enter and see the huge chandelier of bones.
Following this, I headed back to the station, bought some coffee from a lady eating raw meat, and got my train back into Stare Mesto in time for the Ghost Tour!
I love a good ghost tour. They're invariably the least scary thing you can do with your time, but usually you get to hear a lot of fun stories, get some local background and get to explore parts of the city you can't normally. I chose this one because it included a tour of the vaults under the Astronomical Clock at Old Town Hall. And it didn't disappoint. Gruesome councillors, evil old women, hanged noblemen and burnt witches. And a mooch under the ground. All good clean fun. And it even snowed a little, justifying my buying a hot wine and some pastries for the journey home.
Wednesday was my last day and I decided to take a bus out to Prague zoo. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love a good zoo. I like to see the animals, animals I may never see in the wild (like otters - lol), animals that are now extinct in the wild. I like zoos with good conservation programmes. Prague zoo is therefore all the things and has /THE/ most diverse selection of animals I've ever seen at any single zoo.
I was going to go back to hotel after the zoo, to try and find somewhere to eat and get a good nights sleep before travelling back. But then I walked along the Charles Bridge and there was a Swing Party happening and I decided there was time for one last adventure. I found a street I'd not been along yet and lo and behold - A ghost museum. With half-price entry to the Alchemy Museum if you bought tickets for both. I did.
Ghost museum was a lot of scary and wholly unbelievable stories from the days of yore, mixed in with some pretty hilarious waxworks. The Alchemy museum though... Beautifully done. Atmospheric, lots of real life text and examples and a guided tour of Edward Kelley's tower... Which is where the almost Scandal in Bohemia part of the blog comes in. But there is no scandal to speak of. Enough about that...
Dinner at the crazy medieval restaurant and then back to the hotel for one last night of Czech telly. At the party on Charles Bridge, I got a bit teary at the idea of going home. I wasn't ready. I didn't want to leave this pretty new land with its gorgeous architecture and myths and legends. I like Bohemia.
I'm so glad I went. For so many reasons. Because it was exciting to explore a new place, it was empowering to go out to dinner on my own, it was freeing to not have a schedule and to be able to travel at whim. I can't wait to do it again. I'm going to do it again. I foresee this being a thing I do a few times a year, just heading off at short notice to do something new.
Luckily, the sadness at having to come back did not last, as we had a Baker Street Adventure on Saturday. Myself and the Cumberbitches had breakfast at Speedy's, explored the museum, had a spot of lunch and then headed to St. Barts to re-enact The Fall. It's on video... If you're lucky, I'll share it with you.
And Sunday was my first proper craft fair, with an 100% muggle clientele! And it went well! I'd covered the cost of the table and taxi there in the first hour, trade picked up swiftly and people were lovely about the things I made. I made some new friends, ate a lot of cake, drank a lot of tea and had a spiffing time. More of that, please.
I think that about covers it. I really am the luckiest.
 |
| St Vitus' Cathedral |
Which put paid to my lunch ideas.
Day two saw me scrap my plans to head out to Kutna Hora, in favour of further explorations of central Prague and a foray into New Town. I went to have a mooch around the Jewish Quarter and then headed over to Wenceslas Square. I bought Chamber of Secrets in Czech (as tradition now dictates, I must return from a trip to a new place with a native copy of Harry Potter). I found a tucked away vintage paradise and proceeded to spend a happy hour trying on all manner of frocks and jackets. As I went to pay for my bounty, the lady spoke to me in Czech. When I apologised, she tried again in English, asking me if I would still be in Prague on the 1st of March. I thought she meant that must be the latest I could return the jacket I was buying, so I said no and that I wouldn't need to bring it back. She laughed and said "No, no... I want you to catwalk for me. We are doing a show and you would be good in it."
CUE MASSIVE SMUGFACED GRIN LASTING THE REST OF THE DAY.
I need to move to Europe. Seriously. I'm so under-appreciated in this country.
Dinner that night was in a pretty little restaurant around the corner. And afterwards... Feeling very brave... I went for a stroll.
Prague at night is beautiful. Despite the unfamiliar terrain, the winding corners and alleys, I felt completely safe. It's so well lit and peaceful that I was comfortable just exploring quietly. I found a late-night shop, bought a bottle of wine and was about to head back to the hotel when I turned a corner and found myself in front of the Loretta, which is where all the Weeping Angels in Prague hang out. I should point out at this point in time, I'm also wearing a deerstalker.
So there I am, bottle of wine in one hand, camera in the other, deerstalker on my bonce, exploring the grounds of this beautiful church, when I realise there is a car behind me. It was the fuzz! Shit - I thought - they're going to come and ask for my passport and take it from me and charge me a million crowns to get it back. And they might take my wine. And my hat...
They drove on.
Which was kind of the theme for all of my encounters with the law. Unless you were doing a crime, they didn't care. There are a lot of police about, they patrol everywhere but they're not the demons the Internet led me to believe they were. So, sorry to the police of Prague. Thanks for not being corrupt. You're doing a cracking job.
Day three saw me venture out to Kutna Hora to go to Sedluc Ossuary, which is this amazing church that houses the bones of around 40,000 people. On display. As art. This was an exciting day for me as it meant I'd get my first go at using the Prague Metro (which is like the Tube) and also the overground rail system...
EASY.
Seriously, it's so straightforward and well sign-posted that I felt almost cheated. I have moments on the Underground here where I get confused but they just don't let that happen. They signpost. There are helpful staff waiting to answer your questions. There are interactive information boards that tell you all about your trains. So I got on my train, sat in a Potter-esque compartment and read until we arrived in Kutna Hora.
Inside the Ossuary it was much colder than it was outside. Whether this is because of the way it's built, or the psychosomatic effect of being inside a mass-grave, I don't know. It was eerily beautiful, strange, creepy and also serene. The bones are arranged so artfully, that after the initial feeling of being inside one of Giger's masturbatory fantasies, it was easy to appreciate the craftsmanship that had gone into arranging these remains into something spectacular. There's a funny thing about seeing so many bones arranged so prettily, you forget what it is you're looking at. You stop noticing ribs and start appreciating the way they curve into and over each other. It's a small church, but unforgettable from the moment you enter and see the huge chandelier of bones.Following this, I headed back to the station, bought some coffee from a lady eating raw meat, and got my train back into Stare Mesto in time for the Ghost Tour!
I love a good ghost tour. They're invariably the least scary thing you can do with your time, but usually you get to hear a lot of fun stories, get some local background and get to explore parts of the city you can't normally. I chose this one because it included a tour of the vaults under the Astronomical Clock at Old Town Hall. And it didn't disappoint. Gruesome councillors, evil old women, hanged noblemen and burnt witches. And a mooch under the ground. All good clean fun. And it even snowed a little, justifying my buying a hot wine and some pastries for the journey home.
Wednesday was my last day and I decided to take a bus out to Prague zoo. Anyone who knows me knows how much I love a good zoo. I like to see the animals, animals I may never see in the wild (like otters - lol), animals that are now extinct in the wild. I like zoos with good conservation programmes. Prague zoo is therefore all the things and has /THE/ most diverse selection of animals I've ever seen at any single zoo.
I was going to go back to hotel after the zoo, to try and find somewhere to eat and get a good nights sleep before travelling back. But then I walked along the Charles Bridge and there was a Swing Party happening and I decided there was time for one last adventure. I found a street I'd not been along yet and lo and behold - A ghost museum. With half-price entry to the Alchemy Museum if you bought tickets for both. I did.
Ghost museum was a lot of scary and wholly unbelievable stories from the days of yore, mixed in with some pretty hilarious waxworks. The Alchemy museum though... Beautifully done. Atmospheric, lots of real life text and examples and a guided tour of Edward Kelley's tower... Which is where the almost Scandal in Bohemia part of the blog comes in. But there is no scandal to speak of. Enough about that...
Dinner at the crazy medieval restaurant and then back to the hotel for one last night of Czech telly. At the party on Charles Bridge, I got a bit teary at the idea of going home. I wasn't ready. I didn't want to leave this pretty new land with its gorgeous architecture and myths and legends. I like Bohemia.
I'm so glad I went. For so many reasons. Because it was exciting to explore a new place, it was empowering to go out to dinner on my own, it was freeing to not have a schedule and to be able to travel at whim. I can't wait to do it again. I'm going to do it again. I foresee this being a thing I do a few times a year, just heading off at short notice to do something new.
Luckily, the sadness at having to come back did not last, as we had a Baker Street Adventure on Saturday. Myself and the Cumberbitches had breakfast at Speedy's, explored the museum, had a spot of lunch and then headed to St. Barts to re-enact The Fall. It's on video... If you're lucky, I'll share it with you.
And Sunday was my first proper craft fair, with an 100% muggle clientele! And it went well! I'd covered the cost of the table and taxi there in the first hour, trade picked up swiftly and people were lovely about the things I made. I made some new friends, ate a lot of cake, drank a lot of tea and had a spiffing time. More of that, please.
I think that about covers it. I really am the luckiest.
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